Day 14- no valentine to 2

so today is valentines day (obviously) and i have never had one... even last yr when i have a boyfriend he was in north carolina and i was NOT haha so today at work i told my boss this sad story and decided to take matters into his own hands... he sent out a mass text to all customers saying whoever brought me a valntine  the 1st 2 people would get a free drink.... pretty easy ya? haha wrong! no one brought anything... it was kinda sad actually but i didn't mind much because everyones reactions were beautiful ... and i had more then 1 person tell me they thought they were too late for the free drink haha so they tipped me haha
well 20 min. after i left i got a text from my boss letting me know i got a valentine finally... a lady down the street who owns a tanning salon gave me a free tan session ... and 2 hrs later a regular customer came through and when he found out no one brought anything he abruptly left and came back with a card and chocolate... it made my heart smle even though it was all in fun and mostly it all started because my boss wanted to make me embarassed... i don't care too much it made me laugh so so much and the 2 people that were lovely enough to think about me for a sec. when they don't know me ... ur hearts are gorgeous.... and hey i get a free tan haha
so i went from no valentine to 2 ... strangers that go out of their way for you ... that is some kind of JOY <3

the Chocolate the guy brought for me :) haha

Day 13- Babies and Grammy's

me and my hawaiian sis babysat her nephew and watched the grammys... pretty self explanatory haha
but what it called for was pure genius... for the first half we had happy baby... smiley talkative snuggly typical adorable baby... and very quickly he reminded himself he wasn't with mama and then he wasn't happy... and the tears came well not really he mostly just wanted to fuss... for a little minute it seemed like nothing would work i was singing alesi was back-up there was bouncing there was rocking there was baby-talk and to no avail the monkey was NOT having it .... and then me and my sis did was we do best .... vibe off each other and do work i rocked she played an annoying abc app. on her phone ... we had him hooked he forgot we weren't mama bear and all was good... and just as quickly as sad baby came... sleepy baby took over and he was out like an old man taking his mid-day nap... sprawled out on my chest snoring all was good again the world could go back to normal and the aunties where happy i focussed on keeping myself calm and my heart beat steady so he could relax as well and alesi rubbed his back .... This night brought so much joy a little ounce of stress but mostly joy! the team work impressed me and got me psyched when all things grown-up happen and my sis and i get to have babies of our own and help each other
baby chambers you where so much fun idk how anything could top your kind JOY

Day 12- Last Cheer Comp.

so today was actually kinda sad... i wasn't gonna let myself cry and i held off for a long while until coach T had me close in prayer before we broke after the comp and the tears came... :/ later in the night we stayed for an acro. and tumbling comp. between azusa and oregon which was so sick!!! they girls amazed me left and right i am def. hooked and stoked to see this sport grow!
the Joy came from the whole day... seeing a lady (tina blankenship) and all the girls she has impacted through cheerleading.. many have coached under her after graduating or continued to collegiate cheer... she raises such well rounded women i am so glad to be able to say she has influenced me. it not only was my last cheer comp. as a coach for now but also hers... after 7 years of coaching at tri-city she is deciding to move back to kentucky its gonna be weird to think of tri-city without her but like all good things they will come to an end sometime... i hope one day she full understands what she means to so many girls i love her so much

Day 11- I hate all things CAR related

after work today i desperately needed to get my oil changed... so i went to walmart who graciously told me it would be about 40 minutes... re-life translation i figured and hour... WRONG... anyways i went inside walmart walked around a little and realized there wasn't anything interesting so i decided to use my time wisely... i got a good gossip magazine and a wedding magazing ( research for my bff's wedding) and then went on the hunt for a chair to sit in cuz my feet hurt like a mother... i coulnd't find any so the next best thing an exercise bike that had a back rest PRAISE JESUS! i proceeded to sit for a good hour and read through my magazines while on-lookers took double takes (it was a display bike on a stage) and continued their shopping it was so beautiful to let my mind relax and run for a little minute and be able to sit for a little .... not have any rush to be anywhere and have the harmonic sounds of walmart shoppers all around me while i escaped!
lame part of the day ... they took almost 2 hrs :( and i almost fell asleep in the un-compfy chairs they have to wait in at the auto center oh well :)
Free and simple JOys... defnitely one of the best kinds

Day 10- Running Running Running..

i use to always run outside in my neighborhood... and i was addicted but then my anxiety kicked and i swore i was gonna get stolen so i talked myself out of it ... bad plan! haha
i have a gym membership and i like it for the convenience but theres nothing compared to running in the fresh air... its such a better run! harder but better haha .... i drank a red gatorade before i left so i could get my blood sugar up a little (its a diabetes thing lol) and while i was running i would spit out mucus i was coughing up (no biggie happens all the time) but this time because of the gatorade... i was spitting what looked like blood haha .... i think i scared some people but i guess no one cared enough to actually stop and ask just stare at me... so thank you random bystanders who gave me amusement you made my coughing run so much better haha <3

Day 9- Open Gym

all i need to say is Open Gym and the people who feel the same joy i do on this night know where im going with this and i don't need to write anymore cuz mainly i don't wanna call out things im not ready to end yet haha

Day 8- Sister time

lets make this quick and simple...
- yummy food
- compfy sweats
- new episode of teen mom
- the bestest sister friend around
pretty much sums up the calmest- needed kinda joy...
<3

i swear we love each other haha

Day 7- thank you for the tip

so i just recently got a job at a drive thru coffee place by my house... if you know me at all then you would know that i use to absolutely hate coffee if grossed me out! but a couple months back i just got a craving to try it so i did and soon after i was hooked... it gives my the feeling my adhd medicine does without making me feel like im on drugs haha anyways.... this job is super chill yet stressful because its all about speed and making drinks perfectly but im trying non the less haha .... well yesterday (yes im writing this a day late ) i was working the register and a regular customer came through ... he ordered his drink and gave me his punch card and money i rang him up and then realized he had a free drink because he had enough punches.... so i sheepishly apologized and told him he could save it and use it next time but he said "nope i wanna use it now" then i got confused because he handed me $5 ... so i did what i needed to do to get his money back and when i went to hand it back his face was bright red and like usual i was confused so i tried to give him his money back but he said " no that is for you" i still didn't really get it haha because i never pick up on these sort of things so i confussingly put the money in my tip jar and in that moment all made sense and i was now embarrassed.... this young marine was trying to be sweet and sly and smooth and i killed ever ounce of game he was trying to play i didn't know what to say except "ahhh im sorry you where trying to be nice and i just killed it i apologize" my boss on the other hand was crying from laughter and i was all tongue tied... lesson learned for sure haha anyways it made me laugh and the people around me def. laughed and that is JOY right you don't wanna keep it to yourself you wanna share it and infect everyone around you with it... mission accomplished ha!
FUN TIMES AT BLACK ROCK <3

Day 6- Autism= an un-common joy

so superbowl day before the game actually started i was over at my sisters house her husband was on his way home from a week long trip for work and she was def. at her wits end! so while she gave herself a time-out i decided to have some aunty time with my munchkins..... nothing too crazy because i was so tired so we just went out front and attempted to ride scooters but neither boy was really feeling it they actually just wanted to sit with me in the drive-way.... my nolan ocean is autistic and its beautifully challenging! i praise god daily for his parents and the AMAZING job they do with him because its def. not an easy one. but i can't imagine that boy any other way he is so unique and independent and lovey and snuggly and strong and smart and focussed and handsome and i could just kiss his cheeks all day.... his language comes and goes as he chooses and sunday was no exception he didn't feel like talking so he didn't instead there was so much laughter and un-distinguishable noises coming out of his mouth ... its such a peak into his little brain and i could watch for hours.... he was loving his aunty that day and gave me kiss after kiss after hug ... seeing this boy live in his own world that he allows a select few to enter is so intriguing to me he doesn't know social norms or how things "should" be he is 7 and does what he feels and thinks at any given moment without fearing the consequences for himself or others.... sometimes i envy him everyone thinks things they wish they had the guts to say or do ... and my ocean cooley just does it.... somedays when i let my mind run i wonder what the world would be like if people where actually transparent EVERYONE what you saw is what you got.... i wonder how we would function. does my baby have challenges DAILY is he aware of them not likely he knows what he knows and shares what he feels he needs to share and that is it nothing more or less... his smile could make any person forget any sorrow they have for only a moment and it turned out i needed his smile more then ever that day.... he is definitely my angel that i thank god for every time he says "hello aunty"

Day 5- NInja warriors....

so i am like 2 or 3 days late but i have been so so tired so lets just pretend im actually writing this on the real day haha cuz the events really happend....
Anyways... saturday mornings i coach gymnastics.... every once in awhile it is fun to get just a little crazy and break out of your shell because it usually ends up making your classes ALOT more fun and the kids really enjoy it.  which really... happy kids= happy parents = you as a coach doing your job ...( so this actually started thurs. night but we did it also on sat.) one of the girls i work with had three (what we made them) headbands... that her , her brother and i all tied around our heads like ninja bands from teenage mutant ninja turtles and wore them the whole time we worked.... at first i suppose there was confused looks and what not but when we busted out our sweet karate moves and joked with the kids everyone was on board. its so fun to get outside of yourself to make a 3yr old girl who the week before tried to hit you and scream bwcause she HATED your class... yet this week she doesn't want to leave you and when she finally does you get a slobbery kiss on the cheek.... that is TRUE JOY! .... yea we looked retarded and there was a moment when i forgot i had it on and went into public ... but the kids at the gym thought it was funny so mission accomplished .... who knew a silly purple headband could stir up so much laughter... it was perfect <3
even our boss loved it and had a little photo shoot for the website haha

*the above picture is (left to right) amanda, michael, me doing our sweet ninja moves haha

Day 4 - your our "pretty much" cousin

so todays joy time came from people who make me smile from the inside out... i'll give a little background... their my hawaiian sisters: cousin's, aunty, uncle, and tutu (grandma) .... but I'm their "pretty much" cousin ha ha their also related to my ex boyfriend but thats another story... this family is ever so welcoming to me and never makes me feel like a guest sometimes unfortunately ha ha  joking! when alesi and i got close naturally i would go over and hangout... then i started dating one of tutu's grandkids so even more naturally i went over to give her updates on his life ect. ... but then like lots of things we ended and one of my greatest sadness's from it was the fear that this family wouldn't love me the same WRONG! they loved me before and they loved me after... hours pass when were hanging out and it seems like minutes whether were all watching our fav. movie Despicable Me or playing games or playing music or clowning on usually ME ... its to relaxing and comforting ... its a treat for me to go over there and i thank my sis every time because her family feels more at home to me then some of my own...
I love that family isn't solely based on blood... but instead love and community! that's how i have always been raised and because of that i have more siblings then my mother gave birth too... but i love them all exactly the same. Family is so important having that net of people to hold you and love on you and keep you in check...

Even though i am only in day 4 of this challenge to myself i am noticing a semi change-ish nothing drastic but im starting to notice the definite little things in life that actually make me smile from the inside out (JOY) like tonight when i beat a 5th grader at speed 9 out of 10 times and was really proud about it .... or when i got a big bear tutu hug and kiss before i left to my house those little things that sometimes we move to fast to take to heart that really do make you JOYFUL
thank you lord for these moments
<3

this is chynna fa' the little lady with a big middle name ... love you mamas <3

day 3 is this a joke?? haha

so my hawaiian sister is the subject for my 3rd day of joy... well her and her new fiance :)
i was honored to be semi apart of this event and it couldn't have gone better... her and her lovey have been dating for a little over a year and almost immediately they knew they wanted to be with each other forever (isn't that how it should be?? haha) my sis is def. a planner and doesn't really enjoy surprises so i think if he would have let her she would have gotten on her own knee ha! but luckily he is beautiful and went all out to surprise her!
everything about it was perfectly simple yet beautiful and screamed THEM as a relationship! we started on a walk on the beach (typical for us) and about 20 steps into she found a rose with a note to her .. and then another and another and they led her down the sand to finally him .... the whole event ended at the beach him and i grew up on and when she and i became close i brought her too and then they started dating so she moved down to his side... so many memories like before they started dating and we would creep on him and his friends cuz she thought he was so cute! haha
anyways i wish these 2 the best and im so excited to help with the planning of this even cuz its gonna be perfectly amazing <3

i wouldn't want my sister to be with anybody else...
thank you  both for showing me what true love really lives and looks like <3 i love you guys

Day 2 - gymNICEstics

so my day job i coach gymnastics to little peanuts... and daily it is either my fav. thing to do or i wanna poke my eyes out haha just depends but lately i've realized no matter what im really feeling you gotta "fake it till you make it" because the little gymnasts just wanna have some fun haha
so today's joy for the day came from one of my fav. little girls i just started coaching her a couple months ago ... she is a happy 3 yr old that just wants to be loved on and high five'd when she does a skill correctly... you can tell she is use to being around adults because she attempts to talk older then her age. but today was stood out in particular... after her class i was talking to her mom ... the little peanut was also showing me stickers she got at her dance class.... so after she pulled me real close and said here is a sticker for you because you did a good job today... made my heart burst with joy such a sincere smile was plastered on her face and a sense of pride because she let me know  i was doing good haha i gladly excepted the sticker and kept it on my jacket all day... thank you munchkin gymnast for making miss alyse's heart melt <3

                    

Day 1 gavito

so this morning i had my 3rd day of work at my new job... a coffee drive thru place by my house... side note its really good coffee .. anywhoo probably like an hour into my shift my sister brought my little peanut through to get some coffee for herself ... today he was extra excited to see aunty and apparently my sis let him dress himself (im bumming i forgot to capture it on film) but i'll describe he had his pj bottoms and hightop chucks on and in hand his new spongebob kick board he got for his birthday.... he is so proud of this item but he doesn't really know who spongebob is haha! his voice is adorable with his little lisp and off pronunciation of words it brightened up my morning and made me such a proud aunty... and lucky me on his way out he blew me a giant kiss... you can't help but smile when your around little munchkin nephews and today def. wasn't an exception :) 


<3 

this smile will carry anyone through a bad day <3

28 days of JOY

so in this new year im learning to find joy and happiness in everyday little and big things... 

its surprising when you choose to be happy eventually you actually start being that way ... weird haha ... 

so im giving myself a challenge and im going to document it... 

for the month of feb. i am daily going to blog something big or little that happens to me that reveals joy and happiness ... life's littles pleasures i like to think of them 

im laying in bed about to pass out and i can only imagine what im going to encounter... but i have a good feeling about it that i will :) i was told one time that in order to make something a habit you have to do it 21 times so i added an extra 7 times just for good measure... because i feel like finding happiness if a good habit to have so lets get this thing started 

<3 

one of my fav. verses 1 peter 1:8 and 9 

has such a beautiful line "be filled with an INEXPRESSIBLE and GLORIOUS  JOY" 

so imma find that in this next month 

purpose ... :/

why does everyones purpose in life have to come after they achieve a piece a paper costing hundreds of thousands of dollars in a frame on a wall... after they have sat so many hours and been taught things their supposed to believe , understand, follow... is that wrong? nope for many it works out and yet for many very close to myself they do all that their supposed too and that very expensive paper continues to sit in a frame on a wall in their house while they work a job ... that is just a job, a paycheck, a 9-5 while they let adventure slip away. I was told my whole life to find a career that i love so so much and am passionate about- but can i have both 1. a stable income 2. and real passion for my trade .. i have no idea. back story- i suck at school honestly and truly i'd much rather learn biology english anything else in the field actually doing it not being tested on things i was too distracted to study the night before and having to read stories i could care less about and will forget. where are you learning passion in those?? where are you learning about being adventurous? i have always loved the IDEA of school and loved to pretend i was an A student when i was little... i wore glasses so people believed it easily but truth it is ... it was a constant battle with myself my parents and teachers give me a problem i will solve it give me a cheer routine i will make it better in any way i can. have me study for a test- no happening so easily. do people around me know how to handle this? not so much ... is it their fault? i don't want to say it is... people are so so different why do only the ones who have a paper framed on a wall get looked at i bet they can't tell you detailed directions to a place that they've only been to once (i can) i bet they can't make an amazing meal and make you feel like family (my mom can) some say the non-paper framed people just haven't worked as hard... i call bluff i have two parents who have worked their little bootys off everyday 
do i think it is fun to play college? sure do i wish i was like my friends going away and doing their thing? most days yes ... 
but then i am where i am right now laying in my bed @ 2 am listening to music and just finishing up a convo with my best friend who had a real issue they needed to talk through and i was there ... i was available i helped i listened i loved i comforted ... these moments are why i don't regret i wanna be apart of something amazing some adventure like no other .... with or without a paper framed on my wall 

Do as i say not as what has been done haha

my little broskie is 15 (ahhh) he's a freshman in high school... a sports stud and and all around boy so what does that mean... he is into girls and my cheerleaders are into him (yikes) when we where younger we def. did not get along (sorry mama) i hated him he hated me and it sort of in a weird way worked ... people always told me it was just a phase and we soon would be friends and i politely smiled and said what i really thought in my head. but unfortunately they where right haha just joking ... fortunately they where right. don't get me wrong he still drives me nuts daily but now instead of being disgusted by his presence i enjoy hanging out with him. like i said earlier he is getting into girls and their def. getting into him... but im on a mission... he will not be a punk that i myself have had multiple experiences with or i might kill em (joking) i also dont want him to be run over by girls because i know we can be brutal but i just don't see the point in him becoming the kinda guy girls love to hate and hate to love ... he can be confident yet humble... studly yet coy... manly yet sensitive. just tonight i was getting all my stuff from my ex and putting it in a box/ reading old letters, looking at old pictures. he didn't say anything just saw i was bumming and came and say next to me ... and then started playing a game on my itouch... now im 99% sure he was just there for the game but the act brought a happy tear to my eye- REFRESHING... i like that we can finally be like this  i can give advice and still play like a teenager if i feel like it and not be judged haha ... 5 years ago if you asked me if i would be getting ready to snuggle into bed and watch a movie with my little brother i probably would have laughed at you ... thank god times have changed :)

 

advice to whoever reads this: love your blood... and take deep breaths when you have a younger sibling remember you were where they are once too <3

The game... bleh!!!

alright being single now... i forgot the rules of the stupid game... im not saying im playing it or trying too but the thought still occurred to me... 
why do we have to play it? the passive aggressive, coy, hard to get annoyance that starts any relationship :/ my last relationship didn't have any of that THANK GOD! he was in basic for the air force and well there really wasn't time to be stupid and mess around we just where and it worked out for a long while... but thats over now, and im so afraid imma have to be thrown into this world that i so hate haha... that sounds so dramatic haha but i guess i don't like it because i suck at playing it?? ... when i know i want something i go and get it (or try my hardest) ...so if i want you... then i want you!!! haha if my decision is made its MADE... i guess that throws of todays way off thinking though oops! haha i hate having to seem like im not interested if i am or not talk for a couple days to build up anticipation for when we finally do get to talk or acting like  you haven't been on my mind 24/7 since apparently i haven't been on yours... or have i and your pretending as well... seriously? how is this a good foundation to start a relationship? lol i LOVE adventure and this to me is adventure that part that isn't is the constant waiting and wondering ... in my life if im curious about something (anything) i ask, hunt, search, and ultimately find out ... but this little sticky situations puts me back in my seat and leaves me helplessly curious... my best friend and hungarian sister use to say how fun and freeing would it be if we went up to some one and said "your cute im cute... lets date" ok i know thats really crazy ... but the concept still stands... why not just go for it... where do you ever get if you hold back... maybe we won't work out ... but at least we tried and experienced and didn't waste time not talking or hanging out because were making the desire for one another stronger? ... lame excuse if you ask me haha 
but thats just my opinion haha :/ 
p.s im not speaking about anyone specific so no worries haha















i thought this picture is so cute... its a penguin couple haha the zoo caption said its how they pick their mate <3 lol

"Once" by Rascal Flatts with lyrics

Music is the window to the .... soul?!?!

i kinda really really love music... ALL types.. truly! i always have if you really know me then you know me as always singing some song to myself or to anyone who listens. i think listening to different types of genres stretches you as a person and makes you more well rounded haha... cheesy? anyways... i relate moments in my life big or small to songs (also smells..weird) when i hear a song it triggers my memory bank and i am immediately back to what i was doing, experiencing at that moment... also another weird fact- all the boys i've ever liked or dated have a song related to them... for no particular reason and they aren't mean songs haha but its true if you ask me i can tell you... cuz their all so random... ok back on topic- i think knowing the kinda music a person likes truly is knowing them... so since im a crazy roller-coaster it makes sense how i like EVERYTHING.... 
if you know me recently you know i just went through a break-up :/ (it happens) but that fact sparked the idea for this post... theres a song by rascal flatts- once (thank you alesi) that literally sings out my current situation, thoughts, feelings, emotions... do i get depressed when i hear it NOPE... its a calming feeling listening in song what your feeling inside... i LOVE it!!! 
i love rap music because 1.its fun 2. i love to workout to it and 3. if their a good rapper then they use beautiful beats and speak more to me then the actual words... the way the notes hit the soul is the best feeling in the world... alright i sound way artsy fartsy haha but truly .... i can't drive with no music on and im not ashamed to admit i perform concerts in my car regularly... music is a mood changer (good or bad) a silence filler a workout partner and  a way to meet people on a deeper level to me... and i love it oh so much 
here is the current song that im in love with and if you want me to perform it too you hitch a ride with me haha
(the video will be on the next blog post above :) )